When the world seems to big for your shoulders.

We found out on Wednesday that my grandpa, dad's dad, has stage 3 cancer. The doctor told him he has maybe a year. We have known about the cancer for a few weeks now, but not how far along it was. I know that doctor's don't know everything and miracles exist. But none of that makes any of it easier to deal with. This on top of other trials, that we are faced with, things that I don't know how to talk about or explain the hurt they cause. I have reached my limit, I don't feel I can be strong anymore. I don't want sympathy, and filler words. I know that people can't possibly truly understand what I am going through. And that I can only deal with it the way that I can. And it may not be acceptable to you, but its the only way I know how to keep surviving. I know all the biblical answers, I know scripture, I know that I have made it through much heartache in my life, but I am at the point where it seems to much, where "God only gives us what we can handle, just doesn't seem true. I have faced many thing in my not so long life, and this just seems unbearable. I know that I can continue on... I know that I will some how, some way make it through. And I hope, even though hope seems only to let me down with a bigger fall, every time. I hope to look back on this time in my life, and see something good out of it. I hope that I will still see a miracle. I hope that good can come from all this pain. So I pick up all my pieces, and I stand, and I do whatever I have to do to keep moving forward.